Autistic Licence

S1 E23: Sox & Religion

Ok, so this episode may be a bit niche 😉
Leo has been searching for the perfect socks and he believes he has found them ... (time will tell).
Somehow, Siana's autistic brain tendrils manage to link his fervour with evangelical Christian zeal and she goes down and round about that rabbit warren for a while.
We speak about our own experiences of religion as autistic people and wind up reaching quite a profound moment towards the end when we consider the significance of autistic-to-autistic mirroring on actualisation (becoming truly ourselves).
We considered not releasing this episode but we realised there was quite a lot of internalised NT perceptions driving our concern, namely that it could be seen as "dull" or "boring". So we have overridden that in the interests of authenticity and in the hope that some of you might relate. Enjoy (or skip!!!)

S1 E22: Indispensable?

Leo (still) has Covid. Through this conversation we wind up exploring a drive he has to be useful, to serve.
We notice how this shows up between us and reflect on how it may have developed. We also consider how it might change in the future so that it becomes less of a default and more of a mindful choice. 
Along the way you can expect some typical autistic literalism and a discussion about the "Drama Triangle" (roles people play).
 
LINKS
Karpman's Drama Triangle
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S1 E21: Navigating Healthcare

Trigger warning for mention of life threatening scenarios and maternal birthing distress. If you have particular sensitivities around your own experiences of healthcare please consider carefully whether and / or when you might listen to this episode. 
We speak about a wide range of our experiences related to being unwell and / or navigating our healthcare needs.  This ranges from planned hospital stays to emergency admissions, from managing familiar health needs to circumstances such as giving birth and receiving vaccines.  
We notice common autistic idiosyncrasies related to our perceptions of pain and discomfort. We note that many times autistic people are misunderstood and misread, which can have traumatic and isolating effects. We also reflect on self sufficiency and its limitations. And, finally!, we savour the effects of some significant interactions where we have been seen and attended to in ways which felt meaningful and profound.  
We weave in some therapeutic chat related to our own communication this week while Leo has been unwell with Covid.

S1 E20: The Loneliness of Difference

Trigger warningThis episode deals with the topics of loneliness and suicide.Please take care of yourself and think about the timing and where your support is if you decide to listen.
We reflect on our experiences and relationships in the past, which led to loneliness, disconnection and feelings of life not being worth living. We also reflect on the distinctions between company, co-regulation and presence.
We recognise that these topics are heavy and in need of careful and responsible handling. At the same time, they're extremely common among the autistic community and we feel it's important to shine light on them.
 
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S1 E19: Food, noise and the "feel" of things

In this episode we talk about sensitivities to physical and sensory stimuli. We focus on challenges around noise, food and physical (dis)comfort.
We speak about the significance of autonomy. We also discuss interpersonal misunderstandings related to us not doing "what's good" for us.  We note the important distinction here between things being seen as preferences rather than (in)tolerances.
Seasonal references provided intermittently as we experience in real time the 26 minute time difference between sunset in London and Carrickfergus. And basically reflect on how we might control time were we in charge. Sure, how else would two Autistic people make meaning out of Easter?!
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S1 E18: Multi Tracks

This episode is a spontaneous Saturday chit chat. 
There's a fair amount of "here and now" energy and interaction, interspersed with memories and reflections.
Siana talks about her experience of ADHD when it fires in multiple directions at once - something which for her does not exclude hyperfocus "flow" states.
Leo reflects on a range of experiences he is now reframing in light of autism, such as the after effects of exhilarating events and "talking to myself".
We touch on concepts such as echolalia and synaptic pruning, applying these to our own experiences and challenging some common misconceptions. We conclude that as AuDHDers, while we absolutely face challenges around over stimulation, we also have tremendous capacity for sensory joy and pleasure.LINKS
Synaptic Pruning
Mint Aero bar
BNL shoutout
Echolalia
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S1 E17: Autistiphobia Revisited

This episode is in many ways a reflection on elements of the last one.
We speak about early narratives and experiences, and the lifelong meaning and impact of these. We apply this to therapeutic contexts and approaches, specifically Transactional Analysis and Internal Family Systems, and we relate this to therapy with autistic people.
We also explore the concept of so called "rigid" thinking and the possible significance of this for us as autistic people growing up in a world where the template for living which is offered to us does not fit or deliver.
Special guest contribution from Phoebe - Siana's cat - in this episode 😻
 
LINKS
Relational Transactional Analysis
The Drama Triangle
Life Positions
Drivers & Injunctions
“Know all the theories, master all the techniques, but as you touch a human soul be just another human soul.”Carl Jung
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S1 E16: Autistiphobia - Inside Out

In this episode we discuss how we, as autistic people, are seen and experienced by others. We then traverse some thorny territory relating to how we see ourselves and influence each other.
These are sensitive ideas and topics, interspersed with distractions, brain glitches and spiralling reasoning which somehow loops together in the end.
 
LINKS
Neuroqueer Heresies
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S1 E15: Queering Relationships

In this episode we begin to circumambulate the intersectionality of autism and queerness.
We begin with Siana's home interior decorating project and finish up discussing Leo's gender identity development. In between we wax lyrical around some relationship models, notably Siana's current QPR (queer platonic relationship).
Comical interlude provided by Leo's beautifully curated ritual around a previous relationship.
Topic to be continued - we listen to your feedback and suggestions 🧡💛 Keep them coming!Trigger warning : brief reference to suicide in relation to trauma towards the end of this episode
LINKS
Queer Platonic Relationships
Intersectionality
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S1 E14: Airports and Smells

This episode is another “in person” recording.  We reflect on our experiences of travelling with and without accommodations.
We specifically speak about the profound benefits for us of wearing a Sunflower lanyard when travelling in busy and often overwhelming airports.
We also talk about the significance of our sense of smell, in particular Leo’s awareness of this in new places.
NOISE WARNING: towards the end of our chat we talk about the possibility of adding a noise warning to this episode. This is because of some loud noise from people working outside during the recording. The warning wasn't necessary in the end as we were able to filter it out in the edit. Clever us!
LINKS
What is the Hidden Disabilities Sunflower? (hdsunflower.com)
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